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Today I'm listing my second most popular post of 2023. We'll take a look back at it and see what I would add now. Hint: If you click the title it will take you to the original post.
#2 - The Cost of Division
This post was back at the beginning of the year when I really didn't have much direction for my blog or what I wanted to do with it. Since then, I've become much more intentional about posting and topics. That's not to say I'm not as passionate about this topic, but maybe it means I became more strategic or I found my stride? Anyway, let's recap!
This post was in response to Saddleback Church being removed from the Southern Baptist Convention because they ordained a woman. (Go Saddleback!) While discussing this divisive topic I referenced the Suffragette movement over 100 years ago and how Western culture has moved past this particular church "issue." (I got quite sassy!) It's so interesting to re-read this because I can still see where I wrestle with gracious tension today, and I've gotten much more fluent in spiritual abuse (Thanks D. Min!) I ended this post with a prayer.
What I would add:
At some point in the Autumn (I almost put Fall there, but there are too many double meanings!), I stopped arguing. By that I mean, if someone wants to argue with me and tell me all the passages that support their interpretation, I don't engage. I leave them to their views, because honestly, I'm not the one that's going to change their mind. I often think to myself "They're not there yet." It's helped a lot actually. My heart still breaks, and I'm actually lonelier than I was before I wrote this post, just for different reasons.
Here's what else I've learned - if someone wants to have a conversation where they essentially tell you all the reasons you're wrong, you can say no and be happily on your way. Well, maybe not happily, but you know what I mean. I once asked someone these questions:
How do you enter into a space where being unaccepting is viewed as loving?
How do you enter into a space where being accepting is viewed as loving?
And remember... God is in both places, and everywhere in between.
Instead of focusing on what we don't agree with maybe we should begin enjoying the things we do agree about.
Here's how spiritual direction can help...
Looking for a place to share your opinions? One where they won't be held against you, but instead allows you to explore in an environment that is geared towards growing your relationship with God? You'll find it in spiritual direction.
One person once described spiritual direction as a place where "I can gather my thoughts and reflect in my heart." Let me give an example from my own sessions.
My director once asked me if I could use one word to describe my faith, what would it be and why? I had many words - exhausted, defeated, downtrodden, excited, hopeful - but I landed on lonely. It's been lonely since about June.
In a different session, with my supervisor (I need a supervisor to become a Certified Spiritual Director), he asked me what colour and shape my loneliness were (a red glowing orb, in case you were wondering). He asked where I felt it in my body (in my chest like heartache and my stomach like homesickness.) He asked - what is your loneliness saying to you? Then he invited Jesus in and asked what Jesus said to my loneliness, and allowed silence for me to reflect. (Jesus reshaped my orb into a present. I promptly said I didn't want it. How's that for honesty!? Eventually I accepted it, but the ramifications are not something I look forward to.) It was incredibly powerful, and has given me a lot to think about.
Does that help your understanding of spiritual direction?
This has been a lot of fun, and I look forward to reviewing the post at number one! Did any questions come to mind as you were reading? Leave me a comment and I'll respond.
Some extra resources:
Stained Glass Ceilings by Lisa Weaver Swartz
Sacred Belongings by Kat Armas
Rising Strong by Brene Brown
After Whiteness by Willie James Jennings
Please keep in mind that any links to books are through the affiliate program on Amazon.
This doesn't mean much for you, but if you decide to purchase a book I recommended, I'll get a little kick-back.
Remember, I would not recommend something I don't support.
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